I am Immortal

It’s been two weeks. I’m still at camp. There were days when I had convinced myself they were just organizing my release. That was until today. I watched Zeno leave camp today. The general called him to the battlefield. He would have graduated in six months, but they needed soldiers, some mission. I don’t get it. The general barely paid attention to him.

I guess he is good. I try to remember that he is human. It’s funny to think that way. I’ve been labeled. I’m Immortal. Therefore I am not human? I feel human. I think human. Sometimes I wonder if they label us so they can justify treating us different. After all, if I were “human” I would not be here at such a young age. If I were “human,” they would never try to label me as the curse of the country. Then again, if I were “human” I would not hold an ability that justifies such a claim. If I were human, I couldn’t run under a four minute mile. If I were human, I couldn’t knock a grown man off his feet. If I were human, I couldn’t transform into a wolf. I like not being human. I like showing off at camp. I can propel myself up the exercise walls without increasing my heart rate. I can laugh at the boys I pass as they struggle not to vomit during our ten mile run once a week. I like feeling stronger than them.

Zeno really was the only one who was any match for me. He’s seven years older than I am, but our strength was becoming almost evenly matched. I hate him. But he challenged me. He was my drive to improve. My stupid war with him kept my mind off the obvious. I am here, training to enter into a war. I am here, training to be a killing machine. I feel sick every time I think of it. I hate him, but what am I without him? He was the only one who could see me for what I am. He didn’t see the wolf. He didn’t see the little girl whose family was murdered. He saw me for who I am and he hated me. But I hated him, too.

I can’t say I was too sad to see him go. Who knows? Maybe camp will be better with him gone. He was grinning as he rode toward the port. But I don’t think he will be grinning on the battlefield. Maybe he will be. He seems more of a natural killer than I will ever be. Maybe he should be their killing machine. I’ll stay here. It’ll be different. I can prove my worth here. But I won’t stay forever. If the general can’t get me out, then I can just get myself out. I am Immortal after all. I am above the human race. I can do it. It’s just going to take some time…and no more distractions.